Editor’s note: Today marks the one-year anniversary of the passing of Steve Madden. In remembrance of his impact on so many lives, his friend, Travis Blanton, offered the following guest post.
Today marks the one-year anniversary of losing my dear friend, Steve Madden, here on earth. I think of him every day and my life is forever better for having him in it.
I remember the first day we met in 1995 in Senate President Jim Scott’s office where he worked at the time. Little did I know that day how much impact he would have on the person I am today. Over the course of our friendship we fought a lot over issues. Anyone who really knows Steve knows what I mean. He was the ultimate fighter. We fought tooth and nail over the years. Those arguments and fights usually were over being on different sides of an issue at the Capitol. He was brutal to be up against. His preparation and knowledge of the issues were second to none. I learned a lot by being on the opposite side. He made me a better lobbyist. I learned so much from him.
There are several events in a person’s life that change you to the core. And with Steve they all started with the letter C.
The three C’s of Steve. The first C is Carrie. When she entered his life, she made him complete and softened the hard edge that Steve had from time to time. At Steve’s core he was a big teddy bear just with a rough, gruff exterior. She softened him and allowed that teddy bear to grow.
The second C for Steve is Children. Callen and JR melted Steve into a puddle of love. We would often sit in meetings at the Capitol or elsewhere and he would show me the latest pictures of them. Steve was made to be a dad and for the short time he was, he was the best dad. Of course, Steve was almost always the best at everything he did.
The last C for Steve is Cancer. Although, Steve had cancer it didn’t define him. Steve was always going to be Steve. Through his cancer he taught me more about being a good husband, dad, friend and person. His cancer allowed him to touch people in real ways that had impacts that will last a lifetime. During the last 18 months of his life, his body got weaker, but his faith, spirit, fight and impact only grew stronger. He told me some things during our many visits together that I wrote down so I would never forget the wisdom of his words.
Here are some of those words:
In response to a simple text asking how he was doing he wrote:
“I am good. Tired. But my faith that there is a plan is strong. I know He has a plan and oddly it may not even be about me.”
Steve knew God had a plan and he knew that God was using his cancer to change other people’s lives more than his own.
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In a quiet moment we shared once when he knew he only had a few weeks left to live, I asked him what he wanted. This was his response:
“I just want to be surrounded by the people that love me.”
Steve knew what mattered at the end and the wisdom of this is it shouldn’t be something we do just at the end. We should surround ourselves with people who love us for us and we should be around the people we love the most.
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At the end of each visit with him I would always ask him what I could do for him. This was his response one day:
“Travis, just go hug your kids and love your wife. That’s what you can do for me.”
This quote is mounted in our office. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter how many clients we have, what political connections we share, what matters most is what should matter most. Our family.
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So, the lasting legacy of Steve Madden in my life is, I am better in every facet of my life. He made me a better lobbyist, a better friend, a better person, a better husband and a better father.
I must say I smile more now when I think of Steve than I when he first left us. I want to leave you with two quotes. One is from General George Patton for the part of Steve that was the fighter and warrior, and the other is from Dr. Seuss for the husband and father he was.
“It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died. Rather we should thank God that such men lived.” -Patton
“’Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” -Dr. Seuss
