(With apologies to William Shakespeare.)
Friends, family, other pets, lend me your paws.
I come to bury Truffles, not to praise him.
The barking that dogs do lives after them:
The good is oft interred with their favorite bones.
So let it be with Truffles. My noble Mother
Hath told you Truffles was rambunctious.
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Truffles answered it.
He hath brought home many chew toys home
Whose ransoms did my coffers lessen.
Did this in Truffles seem rambunctious?
When that I went to bed, Truffles slept;
Rambunctious should be made of strong stuff.
Yet Mother says he was rambunctious
Here, under leave of Mother and the rest –
for Mother is a wonderful mom.
You all did see that on the Luprecal
I thrice presented him a kingly leash,
Which he did thrice accept! Was this rambunctious?
Yet Mother says he was rambunctious
And she is a wonderful mom.
I speak not to disprove what Mother spoke
But here I am to speak of what I do know.
I did love him once, not without cause.
So no cause withholds me them to mourn for him.
O judgment! Do not call him a brutish beast.
For I have lost my reason. Bear with me;
My heart is in the coffin there with Caesar, I mean Truffles.
And I must pause till it come back to me.
