The post in which I break up with Food

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Dear Food,

I know it’s not appropriate to break up with someone via Facebook, but I don’t want anyone to be confused about why our relationship is ending.

You’ve been hurting me. The swollen lips. The constricted throat. This last month, it’s been obvious what you’ve been doing to me.

Today, the doctor confirmed the worst.

Turns out I am allergic to beef. To most dairy. To hops (read beer). And, of course, lobster, shrimp, and most seafood.

Because of this, I can’t see you any more. For almost all of my adult life, we’ve enjoyed a rich relationship. But all good things must come to an end.

I won’t cry if you don’t.

It’s best to think of the better times. We’ll always have that night at Per Se (and its unending tasting menu.) And I’ll never forget the A5 Wagyu at Tom Collichio’s.

But, starting right now, things will be different.

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. And, unfortunately for you beef and salmon and so much of the delicious food I’ve loved so much, you can no longer part of it.

I’ll always love you,

Peter

Peter Schorsch is the President of Extensive Enterprises and is the publisher of some of Florida’s most influential new media websites, including SaintPetersBlog.com, FloridaPolitics.com, ContextFlorida.com, and Sunburn, the morning read of what’s hot in Florida politics. SaintPetersBlog has for three years running been ranked by the Washington Post as the best state-based blog in Florida. In addition to his publishing efforts, Peter is a political consultant to several of the state’s largest governmental affairs and public relations firms. Peter lives in St. Petersburg with his wife, Michelle, and their daughter, Ella.