Historically, the bald man has faced near-insurmountable social challenges at every turn. To the common man, whose perception has been bent by unfair stereotypes, we are the evil geniuses, the dangerous onlookers, the clone-like cultists and the blank human tofu template upon which all of the world’s worries and fears have been broadcast.
But those days have passed. A new dawn has cast its cranial gleam on the bald man. Today I issue a call.
The bald men (and women) of the world must come together to form a united front. Our carefully shorn scalps can serve a symbol of all that is good and right with the world as we show our support of a man who embodies the leadership traits needed to build a brighter future for our great state. That man is Bill McCollum. His opponent, Rick Scott, may look like us, but he surely is not one of us.
This is the time when we must unite and show our solidarity. Don’t allow a pretender to the dome to drag our great state down to his level. Stand with us to stop Rick Scott from soiling our good name and further perpetuating the unfair and ill-conceived archetype that has been placed upon our lustrous heads for far too long. It ends today.
Join Us: Bald Guys for Bill McCollum!
Raises will be provided to 16 upper-level and mid-level employees of Enterprise Florida, as the state’s